My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.
James 1:19-20, NIV
In keeping with our theme this week about improving our listening skills, we come to some familiar verses from James. In it, he encourages us to pay attention to the mechanics of great communication. He begins with an encouragement to "take note of this." The words in the text tell the reader that this is something we want to pay attention to. If we are committed to intimate communion with each other, we should watch out for what is coming.
James begins his instruction with the importance of being the first to listen. The word, "quick" comes from the word we get "tachometer" from. It means "super speedy" or "fleet of foot." In essence, he is instructing us to be the first to listen. We need to race to hear. This goes against our need to "be heard," but it is the key to loving and building intimacy in word. Next time you are in a conversation, especially if it is heated, win the first place medal in listening.
The second instruction is that we should be slow to speak. The word means to be "inactive in mind." This means that we are engaged in what the other person is saying rather than thinking about what we are going to say in response to what they are saying. The art of listening is to listen fully. Like a good minister, we are there to draw the other person out rather than interject our ideas.
The third instruction comes with an explanation. "Be slow to become angry." When we are in conversations that are conflictual, it is easy to allow our emotions to take over. We have all experienced this phenomenon and have probably even said something we wished we hadn't. From a discipleship point of view, being slow to become angry requires two things. The first is a heart that is healed by the Lord. The second is a trust in the Lord. When we allow our emotions to get ahead of us, it is usually because of one of these two things.
Lastly, James tells us that human anger will never produce what is right and what God desires. In other words, we cannot get what we want from anger. I should have understood this as a young father, because I thought my anger would produce righteousness in my kids. The reverse promise is that it cannot be done that way.
Take to heart Jame's instructions today. Focus on your listening first and then move forward.
Love, Pastor Stuart